7. A conservative pollster recently released a poll showing that Reed's presence on the same ticket with GOP gubernatorial candidate Sonny Perdue would make 8 percent of likely conservative voters march to the polls to vote against Perdue. Reed: an eight-point drag on a GOP ticket, says a Republican pollster. If that's not apocalyptic, what is?

6. Another conservative pollster found that among likely Georgia Republican voters, Reed has a net negative favorability rating. That is, while 39 percent of likely GOP voters like Reed, 44 percent think he's a stinker. The more his base gets to know him, the deeper the whiff they get of him, the less they like him. Yet the more they get to know his Republican opponent, State Senator Casey Cagle -- like Reed, a conservative evangelical -- the more they shift toward Cagle's camp.

5. Georgia has 34 Republican State Senators; in February, 21 of them (over 60 percent) submitted an open letter to Reed, asking him to withdraw from the race "for the good of the Republican Party."

4. Death, riding a pale horse (and wearing a snappy black fedora and trench coat), is asking around how soon he can mail in an absentee ballot for Cagle in the Republican primary, 'cause the Pale Rider is gonna have his hands full reaping Reed's political ambitions on that date. Come primary day this summer, it won't matter if Reed pays Christians to show up in support of his campaign.

3. Famine, riding a black horse, is pointing out that Reed is starving for some positive news coverage. On Reed's official campaign site, under "In the News," there are no news articles posted about Reed. It's all press releases instead. Maybe that's because 78.6 percent of the Reed stories in the last six months mention Abramoff, too. Wow, it's a lucky thing for Reed that the mainstream press is not focused yet on Reed's laundering of payments from Abramoff's clients through the hands of a convicted sexual predator who targeted little boys and girls. Imagine if that got out!

2. War, riding a red horse, is harking to the call of a majority of Americans who are fed up with President Bush's Iraq quagmire. In March 2003, 73 percent of Americans surveyed said war in Iraq was morally justifiable. The CNN/USA Today/Gallup survey released on March 16 found that number had declined to 47 percent. And 60 percent believe things are going poorly in Iraq. So prepare for a backlash against self-appointed prophets who blindly spurred America to war in the name of righteousness.

1. A white horse has appeared from a blue state, a symbol of purity. And he said, "Abramoff is gonna stay in the news for months. And more than three out of four stories about Reed are gonna keep mentioning Abramoff. Please. Ralph is still leading Cagle by four or five points, but come on. Look, the writing is on the wall for Greedy Reedy. His base is turning against him. And the best person Reed can come up with to kick off his home-stretch run is Haley Barbour -- another former casino industry lobbyist." That sounds like good, plain horse sense.